IT Employers ‘Ask for the Mask’ When Hiring
Savvy Programmers Report Great Results with New, ‘Creative’ Job Seeking Methods

ALAMEDA, CA: Programmers who get creative and literally “use their head” can get hired very quickly, according to a new trend developing here in California. Jim Johnson, a Java programmer, had been without work for over eight months. He sent out over 4,096 resumes to recruiters and employers-- and got no response whatsoever. But after discovering a new technique and using it on just one employer, he got an interview and was immediately hired. “All I can say is, I was pretty desperate. Necessity is the mother of invention. I got the idea after reading about IT primates in InformationWeek. ”

Johnson continued. “Anyway…I got the call, walked in with this mask here on my head, and was immediately interviewed. Other people waiting in the reception area were ignored. As soon as I walked in with the mask, it was no contest.”

	Johnson got priority treatment from the first employer that saw him wearing the official Primate Programming™ chimpanzee mask, as he waited for his interview.

The mask? Johnson is referring to the primate mask he wore on his head to the interview. He took a digital picture of himself wearing the mask and a suit, and emailed it along with his resume. He received a phone call in 2 minutes from HR and was interviewed and hired the same day. His story has started a trend in California that is spreading nationwide.

Johnson started telling friends about his new job and how he got it. The technique was used by them, and has since spread like a California wildfire. “It was like, unbelievable,” said Mike Wysocki, a friend of Johnson. “This technique literally pulled my fat out of the fire. Now I’m paying my bills, reconnecting cable and buying Starbucks Latte’s again. I might even lease a new SUV.”

What’s the catch? Employers looking to reduce IT costs are increasingly employing primate programmers. Job seekers that wear the mask are signaling an accommodative attitude to employers about compensation. According to Johnson, “wearing the mask broadcasts this simple message: I will work with you on the compensation issue.”

Many IT professionals are skeptical, or refuse to wear the mask. According to industry analysts the primate programming wave is in full swing, and candidates need to acknowledge the trend and adjust accordingly.

The primate programming trend started when the now-industry leader, Primate Programming Inc, rocked the IT world with low-cost, high quality IT services delivered by IT primates. “PPI” has since attracted 10 million in California VC money. Arnold Schwartzenegger, a close friend of PPI CEO Mark Bajek, has vowed to bring PPI’s headquarters to California if he is elected.

Research indicates that programmers that play the primate angle have a 90% chance of getting a preliminary phone call, a 93% chance of an interview and a 98.75% chance of getting the job if the mask is worn to the interview.

Some are skeptical. Many IT workers will not don the mask, for any one of several reasons. “I’m not wearing that stupid thing,” said Bill Martin, a computer scientist with a Master’s degree and over 10 years of programming experience. “I’d rather work at a convenience store that submit to that.”

As it turns out, that is exactly what may actually happen. The humor web site www.userfriendly.org spoofs an IT programmer who goes to work at—you guessed it—a convenience store.

	Primate Programming superstar and CEO Bajek says that it was just a matter of time for the ‘Ask for the Mask’ trend to kick in with employers. Bajek has become a cult icon in American business culture.

Many out-of-work programmers refuse to don the mask. But thousands of others have happily put the mask on—and got immediate results. These workers received top-tier treatment by employers and recruiters. Bill Dexter is one such programmer using the mask. “As soon as I heard about this I ran out and got one of these things,” says Dexter. “I was lucky to find one. They were going like hotcakes at the mall. As soon as I used this thing, presto—I was working.”

Dexter says he is now helping his friends. “Every retailer who had them is now sold out, so I’ve been lending it to friends looking for jobs. So far we are “five for five”. Now I have a list of ten other unemployed friends that want access to this primate mask-- ASAP.”

A quick check around stores confirmed the story. Apparently, the only source of the masks as of today is Primate Programming Inc’s web site.